Stephen Kuhn

Stephen Kuhn has been leading recovery groups, speaking at college campuses, and providing free online counseling through Belt of Truth Ministries ever since he got steamrolled by Jesus and set free from the chains of porn addiction. His passion is to allow God to use the story of redemption in his life to encourage other men to seek healing through the work of Christ as well.

Weekly Web (W)roundup

weekly_roundup-img-640x290

Each week, we roundup the best links, articles, and videos we find that are relevant to overcoming pornography addiction. Please note that by posting a link here it doesn’t necessarily mean we agree with everything in the linked article. It just means we found it interesting enough to share.


Storyline Blog: How A Homeless Man Taught Me About Heaven

He Speaks in the Silence: What Every Woman Really Wants

Freedom In Christ Ministries: Forgiving From the Heart

735619_754477224579823_1497485146_o

Smart Quote of the Week: James Finley

Quit keeping score altogether and surrender yourself with all your sinfulness to God who sees neither the score nor the scorekeeper but only his child redeemed by Christ. James Finley

Thoughts on this quote? Feel free to discuss them in the comments below.

Weekly Web (W)roundup

weekly_roundup-img-640x290

Each week, we roundup the best links, articles, and videos we find that are relevant to overcoming pornography addiction. Please note that by posting a link here it doesn’t necessarily mean we agree with everything in the linked article. It just means we found it interesting enough to share.


Ragamuffin Soul: The Day God Stopped Loving Me… And Maybe He Stopped Loving You.

Smart Quote of the Week: Brennan Manning

We refuse to be our true self with God, and then wonder why we lack intimacy with Him. Brennan Manning

What are your thoughts on this quote?

The Gospel According to Bono

I’ve been a fan of U2 ever since their Joshua Tree album. I’m not their only fan either, being that U2 is listed among the top-10 best-selling bands of all time.

BonoIt’s no secret that Bono, the lead singer of U2, believes in Jesus. He may be hesitant label his beliefs as “Christian,” claiming the word carries excessive baggage (which I fully understand), but he has never shied away from admitting to be a follower of Jesus Christ.

Which is why I’ve often wondered about the meaning behind U2’s hit song, “I Still Haven’t Found what I’m Looking for“—a song he frequently introduces as “a Gospel song for the doubters.”

Does Bono believe that Jesus is enough, or is he still looking for something more?

But then I noticed something interesting. When I looked at their lyrics through the decades, I saw the same paradigm shift that transformed my own faith:

It appears that Bono’s faith has shifted from one
of constant striving and doubt to one of peace and trust.

In order to illustrate this further, let’s take a look at some of these lyrics.

First, from “I Still Haven’t Found what I’m Looking for,” written in 1987:

I have climbed the highest mountains
I have run through the fields
Only to be with you
Only to be with you

I have run I have crawled
I have scaled these city walls
These city walls
Only to be with you
But I still haven’t found
What I’m looking for
But I still haven’t found
What I’m looking for

When I read these lyrics, I can’t help but think of the sin-management mentality that consumed the majority of my Christian life. I was trying to do everything I could to be a “good Christian,” to follow the rules and make God happy.

I wanted to be with God, but I was trying to orchestrate the relationship in my own power.

I tried to climb the mountain.

I tried to run through the fields.

I was trying to earn my way to God through my own goodness. But no matter how hard I tried, it never worked.

I never found what I was looking for.

Now, compare that to the song “Grace” from their 2001 album “All That You Can’t Leave Behind”:

Grace
She takes the blame
She covers the shame
Removes the stain
It could be her name

What once was hurt
What once was friction
What left a mark
No longer stings
Because grace makes beauty
Out of ugly things

Notice how there’s no longer any sense of striving. There’s no list of things Bono has accomplished in order to gain God’s blessing.

Everything in this song is about what Grace has offered to him.

Grace took his blame.

Grace covered his shame.

The sting of shame is gone, and it’s not because Bono finally climbed the highest mountains or scaled the city walls. It’s gone because the grace of God changed his heart, removing the stain of sin from his life.

This understanding of grace is what changed my paradigm, opening my eyes to the reality that following Jesus isn’t about trying to do the right things to please Him, it’s about learning how to trust what He has done for me.

That’s how Grace makes beauty out of ugly things.

Have you found whatever it is you’re looking for?

10 Lies Men Believe about Porn Preview

Weekly Web (W)roundup

weekly_roundup-img-640x290

Each week, we roundup the best links, articles, and videos we find that are relevant to overcoming pornography addiction. Please note that by posting a link here it doesn’t necessarily mean we agree with everything in the linked article. It just means we found it interesting enough to share.


GQ Magazine: 10 Reasons Why You Should Quit Watching Porn

Freedom In Christ Ministries: Forgiving Others

Christianity Today: Help for the Sexually Desperate

Desktop Wallpaper: Three Sisters in the Snow, quote by Thomas Merton

Define yourself as one radically beloved by God.

Three Sisters in the Snow | Quote by Thomas Merton

How Jesus Used a Cute Girl on a Bike to Remind Me of His Love

In case you can’t tell by my author photo, I work out.

(Insert sarcastic emoticon here)

In all seriousness though, I really am a bit of a gym rat.

The gym I go to is pretty small, so I like to get there ridiculously early and claim the lone barbell before the 6am crowd shows up. This also gives me time to follow-up my workout with a 2-3 mile walk before I head off to work.

I usually listen to a sermon or podcast as I walk my loop, which is a big part of why these walks have become one of the most enjoyable parts of my day.

But there’s another reason why I’ve been looking forward to these walks lately:

The cute girl on the bike.

A few months ago I decided to spice things up and walk my loop in the opposite direction. Livin’ on the edge, right?

Hi Wayne

Hi Wayne!

By walking the loop this way, my route happened to cross paths with an incredibly attractive girl on a bike who, judging by her outfit, was commuting to work. Naturally, my mind deduced that if she rides by here at this time on Monday morning, there’s a good chance she will ride by here on Wednesday morning as well.

I convinced myself that I must test out my hypothesis, so Wednesday morning I set out for my walk in the same direction. Sure enough, there she was again.

Only this time, she smiled at me.

Game over.

To be honest, I have no idea what that smile meant. More than likely it was nothing more than a polite acknowledgment of my presence, much like the smile one would give a passing coworker in the office hallway. Being a guy though (and all of you guys will know exactly what I’m talking about here), I decided that her smile meant she liked what she saw.

I convinced myself that she desired me, and I really liked the way that felt.

As much as I’d like to say I immediately recognized the danger of the situation and switched back to my original walking route, I actually did just the opposite. I purposefully began timing my walks hoping to align them with her commute and have another opportunity to receive a smile.

Most mornings, I did.

And then one morning, she stopped riding by.

The weather was getting colder and she probably started taking the bus or driving to work for all I know. The funny thing though, is I found myself feeling as if I had been rejected. Even though we had never even talked, I felt like something had been taken away from me.

It was in this moment that I sensed Jesus speaking to my heart:

Why are you sad?

Because I liked being desired. I liked being wanted.

But you are desired…You are wanted…by Me and My Father.

I know Lord, but it still felt good to be desired by a pretty girl.

Of course it felt good. She was beautiful. Her smile makes everyone smile—including Me. But no woman can ever desire you in a way that will fully satisfy your longing to be desired. Only My love can fill that hole in your heart. Furthermore, how could she desire you if she doesn’t even know you? I know everything about you—the good and the bad—and I still desire to be with you so strongly that I paid for the opportunity with my own life.

Yeah, I guess no girl can compete with that type of love, huh?

No earthly relationship can compete with My love. Perhaps someday I will bring you a spouse whose desire for you will compliment my love, but it must never compete with my love or it will become an idol. That is not for you to be concerned with at this moment though. For now, just focus on My love and My desire for you.

I want to Lord, but I will need your help.

And I will give it to you. For starters, perhaps it will help to know that she was only smiling at you because you had toilet paper stuck to your shoe. Remember, kid, pride comes before the fall.

And that’s how Jesus used a cute girl on a bike to remind me of how much He loves me.

What situations has Jesus used in your life to remind you of His love?

10 Lies Men Believe about Porn Preview

Weekly Web (W)roundup

weekly_roundup-img-640x290

Each week, we roundup the best links, articles, and videos we find that are relevant to overcoming pornography addiction. Please note that by posting a link here it doesn’t necessarily mean we agree with everything in the linked article. It just means we found it interesting enough to share.


XXXChurch: Sharing Your Struggles with Others

Village Church: Tools for Studying the Bible

Weekly Web (W)roundup

weekly_roundup-img-640x290

Each week, we roundup the best links, articles, and videos we find that are relevant to overcoming pornography addiction. Please note that by posting a link here it doesn’t necessarily mean we agree with everything in the linked article. It just means we found it interesting enough to share.


Storyline: How To Change Your Life in 20 Seconds

SammyA: Why Beating Ourselves Up when We Fail Makes Zero Sense

Christianity Today: My Father Was a Porn Addict