Stephen Kuhn

Stephen Kuhn has been leading recovery groups, speaking at college campuses, and providing free online counseling through Belt of Truth Ministries ever since he got steamrolled by Jesus and set free from the chains of porn addiction. His passion is to allow God to use the story of redemption in his life to encourage other men to seek healing through the work of Christ as well.

Weekly Web (W)roundup

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Each week, I round up the best resources, articles, and videos I find that are relevant to finding freedom from porn addiction. Please note that by posting a link here it does not mean I agree with everything in the linked article. It just means I found it interesting enough to share.


Relevant Magazine: Why We Need to Practice Confession

“Through confession of sin, we admit our falsehoods, cite our pretense, and surrender the sham. We agree with God that our actions and inactions have fallen terrifically short of His perfect standard of holiness and can only be reconciled through Jesus. But confession isn’t just a practice of private, personal prayer. It should often be more public—with a friend or a trusted group of people.”

Dave Willis: Ten essential principles for true intimacy

“Relationships are always more complex than following an assembly line, but here are a few of the countless powerful principles I discovered in the book (paraphrased in my own words).”

Tim Challies: 7 Good Reasons To Stop Looking at Porn Right Now

“My goal for today is simple: I want to give you 7 good reasons you need to stop looking at porn right now.”

Russell Brand: What Does Porn do to Us?

My One Thing: Jonathan Daugherty

“What’s the one piece of advice you would give
to someone struggling with porn addiction?”

Jonathan DaughertyJonathan Daugherty is the director of Be Broken Ministries, founder of the Gateway to Freedom recovery workshops, and host of the Pure Sex Radio weekly broadcast.

He has also authored several books including:

Grace-Based Recovery

The 4 Pillars of Purity

Secrets

Understanding Shame

Connect with Jonathan

Facebook: facebook.com/bebrokenministries

Twitter:  @bebroken

10 Lies Men Believe about Porn Preview


Check out all the “One Thing” video interviews here.


Transcript:

Steve: Hey guys! Steve Kuhn here with Belt of Truth Ministries. I’ve got Jonathan Daugherty on the line. Jonathan is the founder and director of Be Broken Ministries, and he’s the author of multiple books, including Grace-Based Recovery. Jonathan, thanks for hopping on the line here. I’ll go ahead and ask you the question we’ve been asking everyone: What’s the one piece of advice that you would give you to somebody struggling with pornography addiction?

Jonathan: Well it’s a good question. It’s hard to answer in terms of just one piece. What I’d like to do is give the one piece that has a few little sub-pieces to it because to me the one piece that I think people need to hear is that you are worth recovery. Sometimes it’s real easy to get so bogged down in the shame of whatever you’re involved in, with pornography and all other kinds of sexually addictive behaviors, that it’s real easy to lose sight of your worth and not that you just have worth, but that you’re actually worth recovery, because some people feel like “I’m too far gone. I’ve done too much. There’s no way that I’m of any use or any good after all the things that I’ve done.” And kind of within that idea of you being worth recovery is this idea that you’re not alone. That’s a huge part of realizing. When you start accepting the fact that you are worth recovery, you realize that there’s a whole community of people that are also realizing the same thing and that you can get in there and you don’t have to be alone, you don’t have to keep fighting this thing alone, and that it actually matters that your story be told because I think a lot of people don’t have enough…there aren’t enough environments, I should put it that way, where people feel safe enough to tell their story. And I’m here to tell you there are environments out there and we’re here to help you find those environments because you need to tell your story, the full story. Not the story that you pretty up, your Sunday school answer, but like your full story. And then finally we really believe that this journey of understanding your worth and this journey of transformation and recovery, really only happens through the avenue of grace, that it’s through just this unmerited kindness of God that He says “did you know I already know everything that you’ve ever done and I love you anyway and I have a better way for you to live.” We believe that grace is the avenue that you’re going to discover what it’s like to be free and to be new and then I think on that journey you’re going to actually start to embrace and realize “you know what, I can actually start to see myself the way God sees me, as somebody that’s actually worthy of recovery.” And folks when that stars happening, watch out because you’re going to start fulfilling purpose and start doing things that have eternal significance, much farther beyond just the idea of “I’m not acting out anymore.”

The bottom line is I just want the viewers to know that if you are drowning in an addiction, if you are struggling with pornography, that I want this seed to be planted in your mind, that you are worth recovery. You’re worth restoration. You’re worth being part of a community where you can share your full story and find the freedom that your heart’s been longing for for a long time.

Steve: That’s great stuff. Thanks for sharing that. Jonathan, while you’re here, why don’t you just let people know where they can find you online.

Jonathan: If you just go to bebroken.com. We’ve got all kinds of resources for helping people find groups, counselors, all other kinds of books, workbooks. We’ve got programs for people to get plugged into workshops, coaching, all kinds of things to just help people who are struggling with a sexual addiction to find help, so bebroken.com is where they can get all that information.

Steve: Great! Well thanks again for your time and for sharing those words of wisdom with us and God bless you.

Jonathan: Thank you, Steve.

Steve: Ok, bye.

 

Smart Quote: Dallas Willard

“Human beings are at their core defined by what they worship rather than primarily by what they think, know, or believe. That is bound up with the central Augustinian claim that we are what we love.” —Dallas Willard

Thoughts on this quote? Feel free to discuss them in the comments below.

Weekly Web (W)roundup

weekly_roundup-img-640x290

Each week, I round up the best resources, articles, and videos I find that are relevant to finding freedom from porn addiction. Please note that by posting a link here it does not mean I agree with everything in the linked article. It just means I found it interesting enough to share.


The Blazing Center: Why Does God Let Me Stay So Weak?

“Why does God let us stay so weak at times? Why is it so hard to put sin to death? Why do we struggle and fail so much? Why are we so often weak in our faith?”

Pyromaniacs: Not Doggerel

“God guided the minister that day; the word came with power, and that man wept till he found the Saviour. Never give up your husbands, good women, for the Lord may even use a dog to bring them to Christ when you are dead and gone.”

Storyline: What’s the One Thing You’re Hiding?

“Honestly, I knew it would never be a big deal to her, but it was to me. I’m not talking about the truth I was withholding, I’m talking about the fact that I was withholding it in the first place. The thing I needed to tell her would make me look weak, and I hate looking weak around my wife. It wasn’t about sex or sin or anything like that, just something that was embarrassing to me.”

Experimental Theology: Is Porn the Soul of America?

“Pornography is a multibillion dollar industry in America. And since the 1970s it has become increasingly more abusive, exploitative, and demeaning toward women.”

Rosaria Butterfield: Engaging Homosexual Friends with the Gospel

Smart Quote: John Eldredge

“Until a man knows he is a man, he will forever be trying to prove he is one, while at the same time he will shrink away from anything that might reveal he is not.” —John Eldredge

Thoughts on this quote? Feel free to discuss them in the comments below.

Weekly Web (W)roundup

weekly_roundup-img-640x290

Each week, I round up the best resources, articles, and videos I find that are relevant to finding freedom from porn addiction. Please note that by posting a link here it does not mean I agree with everything in the linked article. It just means I found it interesting enough to share.


Paul Tripp: 23 Things That Love Is

“With Valentine’s Day fast approaching, here’s a gospel-centered reminder about how to love. But, you don’t have to be romantically in love to find this list practical. Every healthy relationship requires love and sacrifice, so if you’re a parent, child, sibling, neighbor, pastor, or co-worker, this list is for you.”

The Blazing Center: I Know God Loves Me, But Does He Like Me?

“When Jesus first saved me I believed God forgave my sins. Gradually I came to believe God loved me. But perhaps because of my upbringing or my own lack of affection for others I wasn’t sure God liked me. I believed he put up with me because he’d saved me, but didn’t have any sense that he delighted in me.”

The Gospel Coalition: We are Gomer

“The story of Hosea and Gomer reminds us that God loves us not because of our faithfulness, but because of his. Christ saves, and continues to intercede for, the bride who covets other men. Until we see God face-to-face, we will continue to be drawn to other things. But for now, our Husband stands and fights.”

Covenant Eyes: Singleness and Longing—Why Porn Isn’t the Cure

“As Christians, many of us know this intellectually; we’ve heard the injunctions against physical impurity all of our lives, but for those of us who are perpetually single, we feel like we’re being denied. Porn, then, becomes a stop-gap for a relationship, an attempt to find our places as sexual beings, to meet our longings.”

Christopher Yuan: Christians with Sexual Identity Questions Need the Church

Smart Quote: J.R. Miller

"Men want only the strong, the successful, the victorious, the unbroken, in building their kingdoms; but God is the God of the unsuccessful, of those who have failed. Heaven is filling with earth’s broken lives, and there is no bruised reed that Christ cannot take and restore to glorious blessedness and beauty." -J.R. Miller

Thoughts on this quote? Feel free to discuss them in the comments below.

Weekly Web (W)roundup

weekly_roundup-img-640x290

Each week, I round up the best resources, articles, and videos I find that are relevant to finding freedom from porn addiction. Please note that by posting a link here it does not mean I agree with everything in the linked article. It just means I found it interesting enough to share.


Gospel Coalition: Ancient Wisdom for a Sexualized World

“In his new book The Mingling of Souls: God’s Design for Love, Marriage, Sex, and Redemption, Matt Chandler tackles an array of pertinent questions—both the ones we’re asking and the ones we should be. Working from Scripture’s erotic, covenantal love ballad The Song of Songs, Chandler helps us navigate landmine-laced terrain with timely wisdom and gospel grace.”

Desiring God: But God…

“’But God.’ These two words are overflowing with gospel. For sinners like you and me who were lost and completely unable to save ourselves from our dead-set rebellion against God, there may not be two more hopeful words that we could utter.”

Paul Robinson: Why Grace Means We are Free to Sin

“What if we truly believe that no matter what we do, that Grace is enough to set us free? That even if we spent everyday of our lives sinning over and over that we are still saved from sin? That no matter what we do we are still loved and always will be?”

Covenant Eyes: How to Raise a Porn Addict

“Now that the first of the Internet generation has entered adulthood, porn use has become more common than ever before. Old Internet filtering approaches aren’t enough anymore. Parents need to understand the problem and create an atmosphere of love and accountability in the home. The goal is not merely to keep kids safe online but train kids to become responsible adults.”

Macklemore: Starting Over

Book Review: Seriously?!

Seriously Front CoverI’ve been following Pastor Bob’s ministry for a few years now, mainly through his awesome YouTube channel: Pastor Bob Daily. So when he asked me to help him design his new book, Seriously?! Letters to Myself at 21, I immediately jumped on board.

The problem with trying to design a book like Seriously?! though, is I kept finding myself drawn into the words and stopping to read the book rather than merely formatting it.

Because Seriously?! is written as a collection of short letters, typically no longer than a paragraph or two, it ends up having the potato chip effect: “Just one more and then I’ll stop…”

But I couldn’t stop.

For example, check out this letter on sexuality and tell me you don’t want to read just one more:

The most important sex organ you have is your brain. That’s where it all begins. There are so many messages being thrown at you these days. Society expects you to experiment sexually. You are expected to become self-educated by creating your own experiences. Naiveté is considered immature. But actually, it’s not. You will never have to be an expert in this field. Marriage is an excellent school. Marriage provides a great paradigm for exploring and experiencing with your sexuality. You can learn together with the person you love the most and have an emotional and mental connection with—your spouse. Inside the paradigm of marriage you have security, freedom, and trust.”

Pastor Bob writes in a style that makes you feel like you’re siting across the table from a wise, older sage as he shares with you the lessons he’s learned throughout his own life. Only this sage has truly been in the trenches and ran with some colorful characters—think Gandalf, but with more tattoos.

As an example, just look at a few of the folks endorsing his book:

“Pastor Bob is a man of the street. His wisdom, philosophies & theology are a tremendous ministry to those who have lived ‘outside the box’ themselves.”
David Ellefson, MEGADEATH

“As I reflect back over twenty-six years of marriage, twenty-six years of walking with JESUS and traveling to twenty-six countries I am full of gratitude for this undeserved adventure. Although many have contributed, there is one Pastor/teacher that had the biggest impact on where I am today: Pastor Bob Beeman”.
Tracy A. Ferrie, BOSTON

You can add my name to the list of folks endorsing Pastor Bob and Seriously?! as well.

So, even if you’re far past your 21st birthday, I think you will get a lot out of Pastor Bob’s new book, Seriously?!.


Purchase Seriously?! today on Amazon


 

Amazon Description: Seriously?! is a collection of letters from Pastor Bob to his 21-year-old self. Direct. Transparent. Personal. And deeply intimate.

What if you could go back in time and meet yourself face-to-face four decades earlier?

What would you tell your younger self?

“There are so many things I’d like you to know… So many mistakes I wish you didn’t have to make. And so much wisdom I wish you would have had at 21. I’m excited to write these letters to you. I’ve learned so much. I’ve come so far. And in many ways, I’m just beginning… You feel like you know everything. You don’t think there is much anyone can teach you. You look at people with more age and maturity as being somewhat uninformed and unenlightened. You have the world by the tail, or so you think. But you are not enlightened, you are ill-informed, and the world will begin to get very confusing. And that will be the beginning of wisdom.”

Smart Quote: George Macdonald

“Man finds it hard to get what he wants, because he does not want the best; God finds it hard to give, because He would give the best, and man will not take it.” —George Macdonald

Thoughts on this quote? Feel free to discuss them in the comments below.